When skillets grow.

This blog needs some lightening up after my last few posts, so I'm going to share a funny about Kiel.

My meals are very small these days, so I asked Rich to get me some smaller pans, specifically a small cast iron skillet.

He took me seriously when I said "small" and ordered a 3 1/2 inch skillet for me from Amazon. It arrived and we both had to laugh because it was so tiny. Like doll kitchen tiny. Palm of my hand tiny. Rich joked that maybe if we put it in water it would grow.

Kiel overheard and thought that was pretty cool.

Rich, who takes such good care of me, went back to Amazon and ordered the next size up (6 1/2 inch) and it arrived today. He set it on the kitchen counter for me.

Kiel went in to the kitchen and saw it this afternoon and got very excited. "It grew, it grew" he yelled! He grabbed the skillet and came running to me with it "Mommy, it really grew!"

There is no way I'm telling him that we ordered a new one!

Too funny not to share!

An email from Noah's teacher last week.

 -------- Original message --------
From: awesome teacher
Date: 10/25/2013 1:31 PM (GMT-05:00)
To: Noah's mom
Subject: umm...help! :)

So…I’m literally laughing out loud while typing this.  We talk about some things that Noah does that just are too funny to get mad about.  I have one for you. 

Noah just came in from recess and I thought perhaps he ate something poisonous because he is running around like he is on speed and talking so quickly that its hard to even make out what he is saying right now.  when I asked him if he felt ok he replied, “yes…I feel like I just had a whole roll of gum with red dye in it that I snuck in from home and snuck out to recess with and ate the whole thing”.  He said this as he went into his backpack and then threw the empty package of gum at me (threw in a fun way throw and catch way, not aggressive). 

Any suggestions or should I just let him run on a hamster wheel (or some sensory based activities) for a while?!

As I’m typing this he is dancing and singing…shaking his butt like nothing I’ve ever seen before!!!  I have to admit…he is hilarious right now!   

Obviously I need to check the labels on the Halloween candy better.

I should probably find a new hiding place too.


 

Conversations with Kiel

It's time to lighten things up a bit I think, and I have a handful of funny stories from the last couple weeks that all deserve a blog post. Maybe I'll actually write them.

Snuggling in bed with Kiel the other night and he was telling me about one of the girls in his kindergarten class and how she likes his new hair cut. Apparently she is his girlfriend and he's going to marry her. I asked when he was going to ask her to marry him and he told me that "no, she has to ask me."

It was quiet for a few minutes and then Kiel said "It's good I'm not a girl." And this is the conversation that followed:

Mom: Why?

Kiel: Because I don't want to have to marry a boy.

Mom: Oh. Hmm...but Kiel, sometimes boys do marry boys.

Kiel:(In a high pitched I don't believe you kind of voice.) What?  No way.

Mom: Yes, they do. What's important is that they love each other, and sometimes boys love boys.

Kiel: And they get married? And like kiss?

Mom: Yup.

Kiel: Oh. That is so weird.

Mom: And you know what? Sometimes girls marry girls, and that's ok too.

Kiel: OK. Stop. You are FREAKING.ME.OUT.

(It was all I could do not to laugh at his reaction at this point.)

Mom: Well, mostly boys love girls, but sometimes boys love boys and girls love girls, and that's ok. I'm pretty sure you love girls, but if you don't that's ok.

Kiel: Oh, I know I love girls.

Mom: I just blew your mind didn't I.

Kiel: I don't know what that means, I'm only five.


 

I'm resorting to dreams

It's hump day for NaBloPoMo and I am struggling a bit for something to blog about. I still have a nasty cold and my booger filled head is not very conducive to deep thoughts.

So to prove that I'm really digging deep to find something to write about, I'm going to tell you about my dream last night.

It was a flying dream. As in I could fly. Like a bird. Or Superman.

And it was one of those dreams where I knew it couldn't possibly be real, but I figured if I wanted it enough I could do it.

I was back at my parents house; not really sure how I got there. I hugged my mom and told her I wasn't really there, but I just needed to hug her.

Then I walked out the door, I knew I had to get home and I didn't have a car, so I decided I was going to fly. Even though I knew I couldn't fly, I did it anyway.

The end.

In other news, Noah told me tonight that he "didn't require any more refreshments" when I asked what he wanted to drink with dinner.

Kiel's speech is really coming along!

Today Noah let the cat outside. Don't ask, we have no idea why.

Rich was outside chasing him (the cat, not Noah) and lost his cool a bit and started to swear.

I say started because all he got out was 'god' and then he stopped himself.

Fortunately, Kiel was right there to finish for him with 'damn it.'

Oh yeah, we are rocking this parenting gig!!  

Wise words indeed Son, wise words indeed...

"Sometimes you have to push through the pricks," said Noah, while explaining a video game.

Truer words were never spoken.
 
I'm considering making that my new tag line. 

Pee Happens

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Or here to enter to win a $50 Safeway gift card! 

Or here to win the new Shaun the Sheep: A Woolly Good Time DVD! 

We were in the car today discussing the new freedom we are trying out with Noah. We are leaving his bedroom door unlocked at night so he can get out if he has to use the bathroom, with the understanding that he has to return to his bedroom immediately after.

He uses Huggies GoodNites underpants at night, but we ran out and bought Pampers UnderJams because I had a coupon. Well UnderJams just don't cut it with Noah, and he was waking up soaking wet. Or, he was waking up and changing into a new one.

These "diapers" are not cheap, so finding out he was using two at night was irritating.

So he and Rich came up with a plan and tried it out last night. Noah didn't think he could wait for one of us to go get him out of his room if he called to us, so we decided we would try it with his door unlocked for a few nights. You can read here about why his door is locked.

I don't think he woke up during the middle of the night to go, but he did wake up very early this morning and went to the bathroom. Unfortunately for the rest of us he felt it was important that he come in to our bedroom to announce it to us. Which then woke up Kiel, who wouldn't go back to sleep.

So, back to the discussion in the car...

As we were talking about it and reinforcing the need for Noah to return to his bedroom without waking anyone else he pipes up with  this gem of wisdom -

"well, it's just, when I wake up in the morning, well, pee happens!"

And you know, he's right. My wise little boy.

He has a point

Kiel pooped while I was waiting for Noah's bus to bring him home. I have to be physically present for them to let him off the bus so I didn't change Kiel's diaper until Noah was actually in the house.

Noah walked in the door and immediately said "yuck, something stinks."

"Yeah, I know, Kiel pooped but I was waiting for you to get home before I changed him."

Noah looked a little perplexed and said "why? so I could smell it too?"

These things keep me going!

Noah asked to see the "cracker nut" movie this morning.

I'm finding that absolutely hysterical!

I don't make this stuff up!

The kitten comes racing down the steps followed closely by Noah, who then races down the basement stairs, and immediately back up.


Me: Noah, what are you doing?


Noah: playing hide and go seek with the kitten


Me: Oh, OK. Who's winning?


Noah: The kitten. Have you seen him?

How a 6 year old understands death. Well, how my 6 year old does anyway.

Noah is understandably upset about Rhone's death, but he doesn't show it with tears like I do. He isn't even really talking about Rhone so much as he's talking about death. You can tell he's trying to understand it and place it in his world.

On the way to camp this morning he was saying (although I think it was as much a question as it was a statement) that when I die (me, not him) I won't be able to make another me, or another Kiel.

Then he talked about if he was 999 years old he wouldn't be alive anymore. And he was 536 years old would he be alive? So we talked about how long people can live.

Which led to him confirming how old Rich and I are. And then Bubby. Who he says is reallly old! Then he started with Kiel and worked his way up through himself, me, Rich, and Bubby as to who has the most time left.

And then he said he'd like to be a car so he won't die. So I told him that he's right, cars don't die because they aren't alive, but they do get old and stop working and then no one wants them.

So then he said he'd like to be a brick, because nothing is stronger than a brick.

And that's when we arrived at camp and I breathed a big sigh of relief.

How do you guys handle talking about death with your kids?



Don't forget to enter my giveaways from last week! They are open until I get around to picking a winner sometime tomorrow (8/19). I'm pretty lax on deadlines if you hadn't noticed. On my blog anyway! Not in real life! Or at my job!

And I changed my comment settings to add CommentLuv and I'm not sure I'm happy with how it is working. If you guys hate it or are having problems with it please let me know. If its too much of a pain I'll remove it.

He thinks they hate him

The other day Noah received a card in the mail. It was from my mother. It was a fairly typical Grandma to Grandson note.

I'm happy that my mother is making an effort with my kids, even if she refuses contact me with.

But that's not why I'm writing this.

After we read the card to Noah, he looked at us, confusion on his face.

"But I thought Mom Mom and PaPa hated me," he said.

"Oh baby, of course they don't hate you, why would you think that?" I said.

"Because they made us leave their house."


I have tried very hard to not say anything in front of Noah about my parents. I really think Rich and I have done a good job about not letting him know what is really going on.

It just kills me that he would think they hate him. I honestly have no idea what they really think of him, but I know they don't hate him.

I want to tell my mother this, but I know she'll just blame me for putting the idea in his head.

He said what? - episode 173

Over the last couple weeks Noah has asked us a few times who Jesus Christ is. It's a very interesting question for us to answer, considering Rich is Jewish, and I'm a heathen.

I'm not sure if he's been interested because he's heard us say it a few too many times recently, or because of a commercial that's been playing on TV.

The other day he asked us what Jesus Christ's last name was.

How wrong is it that I told him it was "Superstar?"

*************

Wednesday Noah wasn't feeling well so I let him stay home from school and took him in to work with me for a few hours. I had a couple meetings that I really couldn't miss and I figured he was just sick enough he might be able to actually sit there and play quietly during them.

He did great! I was really proud of him. Noah sick is a very enjoyable Noah to be with. Sad to say, I know.

Anyway, during one of the meetings I noticed he was grabbing his crotch. I learned towards him to ask if he had to go to the bathroom. He very matter of fact said to me, "No, my penis is just big."

Ahh, if only I had a dollar for every time a guy sitting next to me in a meeting said that.

He "accidentally" ate it

Noah isn't allowed to have red dye because it drastically effects his behavior. One maraschino cherry can turn him in to a whirling dervish from hell.

He knows this. Sometimes he even follows it.

Today I let him have an ice pop and didn't really pay attention to what flavor he took.

About ten minutes later he came up to me and handed me the stick

"I accidentally ate a red one" he tells me.

"Noah," I said, "how do you accidentally eat an entire ice pop?"

"I don't know Mommy, I wasn't paying attention I guess."

Damn if I didn't almost believe him.

Things like this are what keep us going...

While having "words" with one of his teachers:

"Miss Lara, it's TB's world...get over it."

--------------------------------------------------------------
When his "helper" wasn't talking to him because he was being mouthy:

"Uhoh, I think someone pushed the pause button."
While holding up a pretend remote. "Click"

Imagination

The Boy has an amazing imagination. Despite all our struggles with him, his imagination constantly charms and entertains us.

Last night he was very excited knowing the tooth fairy was coming. He went upstairs on his own after dinner. When he came down he told us "I was telling all my animals about my tooth and the tooth fairy. They are upstairs discussing it now."

This morning when Amazing Daddy went in to get him up, he told him "the tooth fairy came and she gave me a big hug and kiss!".

He regularly has conversations with Baby
Brother and isn't the least bit put off that BB doesn't answer him. TB just answers for him. It is so freaking adorable!

Words a mother should never hear...

Me: what is that noise?

Amazing Daddy: Oh, huh, sounds like The Boy has his saw in his bedroom.

Overheard this morning

"Luckily, it all stayed inside."

After The Boy sneezed.

Tooth Fairy

The Boy asked us the other night if the Tooth Fairy was strong. Amazing Daddy and I looked at each other not quite sure where he was headed with this question.

So I said, "well, I think she's small...and since teeth are small, she doesn't need to be particularly strong to carry them."

TB wasn't really comfortable with this answer, so he came up to me and opened his mouth and started to push on his teeth. I thought he was thinking that the Tooth Fairy pulled the teeth from your mouth, so I quickly let him know that wasn't the case.

But that still wasn't what he was thinking..."See Mommy," he said, "my teeth are hard...the Tooth Fairy would have to be really strong to put them in here."

Ahhh...that's what he's thinking. That the Tooth Fairy puts teeth back in your mouth.

It's fascinating how kids minds work!

Jewish house

Amazing Daddy and The Boy have been enjoying their drives home from work/preschool lately, looking at all the Christmas lights on the houses.

The Boy wanted to know why some houses didn't have lights, so AD said that maybe Jewish families lived in those houses.

A few minutes later AD hears The Boy talking to himself: "Jewish house, Jewish house, not a Jewish house, another Jewish house."


Then last night they stopped at BJ's to get gas and The Boy told AD "BJ's is not Jewish."

I wonder when he'll realize this is a Jewish house? Maybe the Christmas tree in the front window is confusing him...