Herman the Hemorrhoid that is. Or Hermy, as I (not so) affectionately call him.
Yes, a walnut size mass has taken over my anal region. And it ain’t pretty. Or comfortable.
All in all I’ve been pretty lucky as far as the irritating pregnancy issues go. No varicose veins (yet), no stretch marks, no sciatica, I’m not waddling yet.
But damn Hermy, you came on with a vengeance this week.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
Saturday, October 06, 2007
34 weeks and counting
So here I am just shy of 35 weeks. I feel huge, of course. And awkward. I literally have to pick my belly up when I roll over in bed so it will follow me. Baby brother is riding high and giving me a bit of a scare that he's never going to turn head down. He's taking up a lot of room in there, thus making it hard to catch my breath and leaving me little room to eat. Can't say that lack of hunger is a bad thing. I continue to stay within the same 2 or 3 pound range, but he continues to grow, so the doctors are pleased.
I really can't complain with how this pregnancy is going, and feel like I don't deserve to complain. I am however tired, and getting tired of not being able to do things. The house is getting out of control and the baby's room is still not done.
Oh yes, about the baby's room. I'm getting close to having the painting finished. We had a chair rail put up yesterday, which I need to wood putty the nail holes and then paint. After that other than some touch ups I think the painting will be done. Unfortunately, the first weekend I started painting, Amazing Daddy and The Boy were "helping." TB started to get a little wild, and I asked AD to get him, since I was up on the ladder. Unfortunately, AD kicked over a gallon of green paint in the process. About 3/4 of a gallon of paint on the carpet. Quite the mess. I swear, that man will do anything to get out of painting! Ha. Actually, he felt awful about it, and it was a total accident. I shouldn't have had the can where I did.
So, we are getting new floors. And, since I really wanted wood floors from the beginning, that's what we are getting. Of course, I didn't have this in the budget, and they are costing 2 times what I thought they would. Ughhh... But, they are going to look gorgeous (if they ever get them installed). This room will probably look better than any other room in the house.
Hopefully as soon as the floors are down and I finish the final touch ups, the furniture will be ready to be delivered. Only then will I feel like I can start sorting through the clothes and really seeing what we have left to get. Right how what we do have (yeah for hand me downs!) is all sitting in our dining room. I will feel so much better when the room is ready.
We did register at Baby's R Us and Target, but more to help me keep track of what we need, than anything else. There has been no talk of anyone giving us a baby shower. I admit, I'm very disappointed. Unfortunately, it's part of that "bigger picture" that I've had in my head all these years, while waiting and hoping I would get pregnant. I'll get over it though. Since, technically, this is our second child, I understand. Not to mention that AD's side of the family is Jewish and don't do baby showers.
AD has really stepped up to the plate the last couple weeks. He's been very helpful around the house, he's been doing about 95% of the cooking and taking care of TB. And he's been very sweet to me.
We started birthing classes last week and I think that has helped him see that this is real. Plus the instructor is very verbal about the dad's needing to take care of the mom's, and AD is listening! It has been so nice!
We need to spend more time practicing the relaxation stuff they are teaching us, but we are trying. I do feel like I've learned some stuff from the class, and have a better idea of what to expect.
I went in to the class with a "give me drugs" attitude, but I'm thinking now I'd like to go as long as I can without getting an epidural. I really don't want to be stuck in bed any more than I have to. It sounds like being up and moving makes things move along faster, so that's what I'm going to try for.
Our biggest concern is what we are going to do with The Boy. We do have some people on call to help us out, and when I know I'm definitely in labor I'm to call my parents so they can start the 12 hour drive out from Michigan. I didn't realize that there was so much laboring done at home. I'm not sure how TB will handle that. I'm such a planner, that this bit of "when will it start" is hard for me. But, still exciting.
As for my parents coming I'm glad they will be here, especially to help out with The Boy. I can also trust my mom to pick up what ever baby stuff we didn't get around to buying. My concern though is that if I go late, we may be getting close to Thanksgiving. My mom has had Thanksgiving at her house for the family "on the farm" the last couple years. Knowing her, she won't think it is ok to not do it this year. Or to cancel at the last minute (even though my brother, my cousin, or my aunt and uncle are all capable of handling it). So, I know she will start to stress about this if it gets close to it. And, I'll start to feel like its a competition between me and "the farm." Fortunately my dad is more flexible with stuff like this, and will hopefully keep her calm.
There have been so many things I've wanted to blog about in the last couple weeks, just haven't been in the writing mood. Hopefully I'll do better in these last couple weeks.
I really can't complain with how this pregnancy is going, and feel like I don't deserve to complain. I am however tired, and getting tired of not being able to do things. The house is getting out of control and the baby's room is still not done.
Oh yes, about the baby's room. I'm getting close to having the painting finished. We had a chair rail put up yesterday, which I need to wood putty the nail holes and then paint. After that other than some touch ups I think the painting will be done. Unfortunately, the first weekend I started painting, Amazing Daddy and The Boy were "helping." TB started to get a little wild, and I asked AD to get him, since I was up on the ladder. Unfortunately, AD kicked over a gallon of green paint in the process. About 3/4 of a gallon of paint on the carpet. Quite the mess. I swear, that man will do anything to get out of painting! Ha. Actually, he felt awful about it, and it was a total accident. I shouldn't have had the can where I did.
So, we are getting new floors. And, since I really wanted wood floors from the beginning, that's what we are getting. Of course, I didn't have this in the budget, and they are costing 2 times what I thought they would. Ughhh... But, they are going to look gorgeous (if they ever get them installed). This room will probably look better than any other room in the house.
Hopefully as soon as the floors are down and I finish the final touch ups, the furniture will be ready to be delivered. Only then will I feel like I can start sorting through the clothes and really seeing what we have left to get. Right how what we do have (yeah for hand me downs!) is all sitting in our dining room. I will feel so much better when the room is ready.
We did register at Baby's R Us and Target, but more to help me keep track of what we need, than anything else. There has been no talk of anyone giving us a baby shower. I admit, I'm very disappointed. Unfortunately, it's part of that "bigger picture" that I've had in my head all these years, while waiting and hoping I would get pregnant. I'll get over it though. Since, technically, this is our second child, I understand. Not to mention that AD's side of the family is Jewish and don't do baby showers.
AD has really stepped up to the plate the last couple weeks. He's been very helpful around the house, he's been doing about 95% of the cooking and taking care of TB. And he's been very sweet to me.
We started birthing classes last week and I think that has helped him see that this is real. Plus the instructor is very verbal about the dad's needing to take care of the mom's, and AD is listening! It has been so nice!
We need to spend more time practicing the relaxation stuff they are teaching us, but we are trying. I do feel like I've learned some stuff from the class, and have a better idea of what to expect.
I went in to the class with a "give me drugs" attitude, but I'm thinking now I'd like to go as long as I can without getting an epidural. I really don't want to be stuck in bed any more than I have to. It sounds like being up and moving makes things move along faster, so that's what I'm going to try for.
Our biggest concern is what we are going to do with The Boy. We do have some people on call to help us out, and when I know I'm definitely in labor I'm to call my parents so they can start the 12 hour drive out from Michigan. I didn't realize that there was so much laboring done at home. I'm not sure how TB will handle that. I'm such a planner, that this bit of "when will it start" is hard for me. But, still exciting.
As for my parents coming I'm glad they will be here, especially to help out with The Boy. I can also trust my mom to pick up what ever baby stuff we didn't get around to buying. My concern though is that if I go late, we may be getting close to Thanksgiving. My mom has had Thanksgiving at her house for the family "on the farm" the last couple years. Knowing her, she won't think it is ok to not do it this year. Or to cancel at the last minute (even though my brother, my cousin, or my aunt and uncle are all capable of handling it). So, I know she will start to stress about this if it gets close to it. And, I'll start to feel like its a competition between me and "the farm." Fortunately my dad is more flexible with stuff like this, and will hopefully keep her calm.
There have been so many things I've wanted to blog about in the last couple weeks, just haven't been in the writing mood. Hopefully I'll do better in these last couple weeks.
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Response to a few comments
Yeah, love the drink more water advice. Like my bladder isn't tortured enough these days.
I have that big elastic belt thingy. It does help, but gets uncomfortable by the end of the day. And if it's not arranged just right the velcro rubs on me and drives me crazy.
I'm having a hard time keeping the big ol' granny panties up these days. I think my (very flat) butt is getting smaller. I haven't gained weight with the pregnancy (don't hate me, I gained 40 pounds during all the IVF's, and I wasn't small to begin with) so I guess the fattage had to have moved from somewhere. So yeah, I think I'm the only pregnant woman whose butt and boobs got smaller instead of bigger.
And hubby update...he actually touched my big ol' pregnant belly last night, all on his own! I think three weeks plus without sex is getting to him.
I have that big elastic belt thingy. It does help, but gets uncomfortable by the end of the day. And if it's not arranged just right the velcro rubs on me and drives me crazy.
I'm having a hard time keeping the big ol' granny panties up these days. I think my (very flat) butt is getting smaller. I haven't gained weight with the pregnancy (don't hate me, I gained 40 pounds during all the IVF's, and I wasn't small to begin with) so I guess the fattage had to have moved from somewhere. So yeah, I think I'm the only pregnant woman whose butt and boobs got smaller instead of bigger.
And hubby update...he actually touched my big ol' pregnant belly last night, all on his own! I think three weeks plus without sex is getting to him.
Sunday, September 09, 2007
On husbands and an irritable uterus
Ok, so life is better. Sorry I haven't updated in a while.
Amazing Daddy and I went away for a few days the week before Labor Day and it was quite nice. Great to have a chance to reconnect and be alone for a while.
We also had a session with The Boy's therapist where we just focused on the two of us. That was good too, to have a facilitated talk. I was impressed at how open AD was able to be.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
On another note, AD and I spent our 7th wedding anniversary in Labor and Delivery last weekend. How's that for excitement?
Not really sure what happened, probably a combination of getting a little dehydrated, doing a little too much trying to get the baby's room ready, and being constipated. I had terrible lower abdominal cramps. So bad I could hardly move without crying. So we called the doctor on call and she sent us in. By that time I was pretty scared.
They hooked me up to a monitor and tried to get an IV in me. I'm not an easy stick. They finally had to call the IV team in to get one in, which took over an hour to get there. I was definitely having some contractions, or what they liked to call "uterine irritability." It felt like this band of extreme tightness across my lower abdomen that didn't ease up. I kept saying I thought contractions come and go, but this was constant. Fortunately the baby was doing fine, and my cervix was still long and closed. They did a fetal fibronectin test which came back negative, thus relieving more of my fears.
It was fun to hear the heartbeat for an extended period of time, and for a while we even got to hear him hiccup. Very cool. A couple times since then I've even felt him hiccup.
After about five hours they sent me home and told me to take it easy and said I have an irritable uterus (like that's the only thing irritable with me lately??). I was still in pretty bad pain when we got home. I just couldn't get comfortable and did lots of moaning and squirming. Poor AD. I think I scared him.
So I took it easy the next day and slept a lot. Praying I would poop sometime soon. I really think a lot of it was a big ol' stuck poop and then I stressed some accessory muscles. Who knows.
I was still uncomfortable for a few days, but I'm feeling much better now. I'm just trying to be very careful not to over do it, to keep hydrated, and to keep pooping.
I still feel tightening when I stand up from sitting or laying. I ordered a maternity belt to try and help with that. It came yesterday and seems to be useful, although it is quite a contraption to put on. Riding in the car is not comfortable any more. Taking The Boy to school in the morning and then getting to work is about as far as I can go, and even then I get out of the car and feel my uterus tightening up. I guess we won't be making that trip back to Michigan that I had hoped for at the end of the month.
So all in all, everything is ok!
Amazing Daddy and I went away for a few days the week before Labor Day and it was quite nice. Great to have a chance to reconnect and be alone for a while.
We also had a session with The Boy's therapist where we just focused on the two of us. That was good too, to have a facilitated talk. I was impressed at how open AD was able to be.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
On another note, AD and I spent our 7th wedding anniversary in Labor and Delivery last weekend. How's that for excitement?
Not really sure what happened, probably a combination of getting a little dehydrated, doing a little too much trying to get the baby's room ready, and being constipated. I had terrible lower abdominal cramps. So bad I could hardly move without crying. So we called the doctor on call and she sent us in. By that time I was pretty scared.
They hooked me up to a monitor and tried to get an IV in me. I'm not an easy stick. They finally had to call the IV team in to get one in, which took over an hour to get there. I was definitely having some contractions, or what they liked to call "uterine irritability." It felt like this band of extreme tightness across my lower abdomen that didn't ease up. I kept saying I thought contractions come and go, but this was constant. Fortunately the baby was doing fine, and my cervix was still long and closed. They did a fetal fibronectin test which came back negative, thus relieving more of my fears.
It was fun to hear the heartbeat for an extended period of time, and for a while we even got to hear him hiccup. Very cool. A couple times since then I've even felt him hiccup.
After about five hours they sent me home and told me to take it easy and said I have an irritable uterus (like that's the only thing irritable with me lately??). I was still in pretty bad pain when we got home. I just couldn't get comfortable and did lots of moaning and squirming. Poor AD. I think I scared him.
So I took it easy the next day and slept a lot. Praying I would poop sometime soon. I really think a lot of it was a big ol' stuck poop and then I stressed some accessory muscles. Who knows.
I was still uncomfortable for a few days, but I'm feeling much better now. I'm just trying to be very careful not to over do it, to keep hydrated, and to keep pooping.
I still feel tightening when I stand up from sitting or laying. I ordered a maternity belt to try and help with that. It came yesterday and seems to be useful, although it is quite a contraption to put on. Riding in the car is not comfortable any more. Taking The Boy to school in the morning and then getting to work is about as far as I can go, and even then I get out of the car and feel my uterus tightening up. I guess we won't be making that trip back to Michigan that I had hoped for at the end of the month.
So all in all, everything is ok!
Thursday, September 06, 2007
Sunday, August 19, 2007
The Ladies
Yes, I'm still emotional, but let's talk about The Ladies today.
I'm quite fascinated with my own breasts. I have been pretty much since they first appeared when I was a pre-teen/teen.
Well now, let me tell you, they have become my latest obsession. I can't stop looking at them, poking them, prodding them, and squeezing them. My nipples are amazing! I mean, they are huge! And the areola, wowzers! And now, they are starting to produce colostrum. How exciting is that?!?
So, please excuse me why I go admire them and squeeze out a little juice.
And yes, AD thinks I've totally lost it.
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Still on the subject of boobs, please send some love out to my friend NG who is going in for a breast biopsy tomorrow. She has some lovely Ladie's herself!
I'm quite fascinated with my own breasts. I have been pretty much since they first appeared when I was a pre-teen/teen.
Well now, let me tell you, they have become my latest obsession. I can't stop looking at them, poking them, prodding them, and squeezing them. My nipples are amazing! I mean, they are huge! And the areola, wowzers! And now, they are starting to produce colostrum. How exciting is that?!?
So, please excuse me why I go admire them and squeeze out a little juice.
And yes, AD thinks I've totally lost it.
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Still on the subject of boobs, please send some love out to my friend NG who is going in for a breast biopsy tomorrow. She has some lovely Ladie's herself!
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Lonely
I haven't posted much recently because I haven't been sure how to say what has been going on, especially in my head.
I've been so emotional the last few weeks. It seems like every other day I start crying and can't seem to stop. One day was so bad I couldn't even go to work.
I can't completely pinpoint what is going on, but I think a lot of it is I feel lonely lately. Of course, even I ask myself how I can feel lonely when I have a son and husband.
I'm certainly feeling the lack of female friendship these days, more than I have in years. I regret that I never made any close friendships when I moved here, other than Jen and Nancy, who both moved away. When I first moved here I didn't need anyone other than Amazing Daddy. I didn't want to be with anyone else. Then The Boy came along and my life was full, and busy.
Here and there I have felt the gap, but for the most part I was able to fill it with something else. Now though, probably because I feel this distance between AD and myself, it is more obvious that I don't have anyone else to lean on or talk to.
God, even writing this has me in tears. Man, these pregnancy hormones can just go fuck themselves.
All I know is I have all these amazing things going on in my body, and my sex drive is going crazy, and I feel like I have no one to share it with. Not that I would be sharing that with a girlfriend...but at least I could bitch about it with her.
I miss my husband. I miss good sex. I miss my sanity.
I've been so emotional the last few weeks. It seems like every other day I start crying and can't seem to stop. One day was so bad I couldn't even go to work.
I can't completely pinpoint what is going on, but I think a lot of it is I feel lonely lately. Of course, even I ask myself how I can feel lonely when I have a son and husband.
I'm certainly feeling the lack of female friendship these days, more than I have in years. I regret that I never made any close friendships when I moved here, other than Jen and Nancy, who both moved away. When I first moved here I didn't need anyone other than Amazing Daddy. I didn't want to be with anyone else. Then The Boy came along and my life was full, and busy.
Here and there I have felt the gap, but for the most part I was able to fill it with something else. Now though, probably because I feel this distance between AD and myself, it is more obvious that I don't have anyone else to lean on or talk to.
God, even writing this has me in tears. Man, these pregnancy hormones can just go fuck themselves.
All I know is I have all these amazing things going on in my body, and my sex drive is going crazy, and I feel like I have no one to share it with. Not that I would be sharing that with a girlfriend...but at least I could bitch about it with her.
I miss my husband. I miss good sex. I miss my sanity.
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
Thursday, August 02, 2007
No longer wanted
Last night I asked (not so) Amazing Daddy to help me take off the nail polish on my toe nails. Frankly, it’s getting harder to get down that far and still be able to breath. Not to mention too much bending over like that has been known to trigger my gag reflex, resulting in nasty vomiting.
Well, you would have thought I had asked him to wipe my shit covered ass.
I mean, WTF? So my ankles are a little swollen, it’s not like my feet are nasty.
Well, he did it, but grudgingly. I swear he did everything he could to not actually have to touch anything.
Honestly, it really hurt my feelings. It’s been fairly clear the last couple weeks that he is just not attracted to me anymore. And here I am, actually having a libido for once! Apparently, now that I have to be on top, he feels crushed by me.
Way to make a girl feel good! It really hurt my feelings.
Well, you would have thought I had asked him to wipe my shit covered ass.
I mean, WTF? So my ankles are a little swollen, it’s not like my feet are nasty.
Well, he did it, but grudgingly. I swear he did everything he could to not actually have to touch anything.
Honestly, it really hurt my feelings. It’s been fairly clear the last couple weeks that he is just not attracted to me anymore. And here I am, actually having a libido for once! Apparently, now that I have to be on top, he feels crushed by me.
Way to make a girl feel good! It really hurt my feelings.
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