Nothing exciting to report. All very boring actually.
I'm still not showing, yet I only have two pair of pants that actually fit me. I may have to break down and buy some pregnancy shorts and Capri's, but I'm not looking forward to it. I can't wait until I show so I don't just look fat(er). I think that may take a while though, since I actually am fat. Thank goodness empire waist and baby doll styles are in right now, because I find them very comfortable and in my mind at least they give the illusion of pregnancy.
I'm still tired, but perhaps not as bad as I was. I do have days with some energy, but then seem to pay for it the next day. I have a feeling I did myself a disservice spending the first three months on the couch. A little exercise then would have been good for me and perhaps I would have more energy now.
Can I tell you about my skin? Holy cow, my neck and shoulders are breaking out like crazy. Big red pimples, that rarely come to a head, but then last forever. I think some of them are trying to turn in to skin tags, but I refuse to let them. It's something else, I tell you.
I rented a Doppler about a week ago. Believe it or not I've only listened once, the day I got it. This was after a weekend that I was feeling some odd cramping and just felt strange over all. I needed the reassurance that something was still growing in there. This week though, I've felt good, and just believe that everything is OK. My next ultrasound is next Friday. I can't wait to see how much baby has grown in the last four weeks.
Boobs are still huge, and sore. And man oh man, but did the nipples get huge!
Saturday, May 26, 2007
Thursday, May 17, 2007
No tongues were severed in the writing of this blog
In the last week or so The Boy has decided that sticking out his tongue is the four year old version of giving the middle finger. And I’m sure that’s only because he doesn’t know about giving the middle finger. So whenever we tell him something he doesn’t want to hear, or he’s in the middle of a temper tantrum, amongst all his other actions, out slides his adorable little tongue.
Frankly, I just ignore it. Of all the things he does, a little tongue sticking is pretty minor. However, they appear to find it somewhat more offensive at school. So yesterday, after being taken out into the hall by one of his teachers (Miss L), another teacher (Miss T) walked by and asked what was going on. Miss L told Miss T that TB was being very fresh to hear and was not being a nice friend. Miss T saw TB stick out his tongue so she told him that in her classroom she had a special pair of scissors just for that, and she could just go SNIP and take care of it for him.
Well, talk about freaking a kid out! Apparently TB lost it and expressed great remorse, and promised never to do it again.
Fast forward a couple hours to the annual bedtime for wild animals party, as we struggle to get TB to do anything even remotely related to assisting in his bedtime ritual, and once again, out slips that tongue of his. Well, Daddy now knowing about that special pair of scissors told TB that he was going to call Miss T and ask her to bring them over. So he got on the phone and did just that. Well, hysteria ensued. TB completely lost his shit. He begged and promised he would never do it again, just please, please call Miss T and tell her not to come. So, Daddy called Miss T again and told her TB promised he wouldn’t do it again.
Where was I during this exchange? Laughing hysterically as I listened from the living room. Yeah, I know…worlds worst mother here.
Frankly, I just ignore it. Of all the things he does, a little tongue sticking is pretty minor. However, they appear to find it somewhat more offensive at school. So yesterday, after being taken out into the hall by one of his teachers (Miss L), another teacher (Miss T) walked by and asked what was going on. Miss L told Miss T that TB was being very fresh to hear and was not being a nice friend. Miss T saw TB stick out his tongue so she told him that in her classroom she had a special pair of scissors just for that, and she could just go SNIP and take care of it for him.
Well, talk about freaking a kid out! Apparently TB lost it and expressed great remorse, and promised never to do it again.
Fast forward a couple hours to the annual bedtime for wild animals party, as we struggle to get TB to do anything even remotely related to assisting in his bedtime ritual, and once again, out slips that tongue of his. Well, Daddy now knowing about that special pair of scissors told TB that he was going to call Miss T and ask her to bring them over. So he got on the phone and did just that. Well, hysteria ensued. TB completely lost his shit. He begged and promised he would never do it again, just please, please call Miss T and tell her not to come. So, Daddy called Miss T again and told her TB promised he wouldn’t do it again.
Where was I during this exchange? Laughing hysterically as I listened from the living room. Yeah, I know…worlds worst mother here.
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Thursday, May 10, 2007
Kind of a good-news/bad-news frustrating sort of day yesterday.
Good news: first results from the sequential screen blood test came back and were excellent. Risk of downs is 1 in 4900, risk of trisomy 18 1 in 10,000.
We’ll go for the next blood draw in three weeks.
Bad news: One of my coworkers was fired today. Of course we are given very little information (although I know that her attitude and inability to get along with our boss has been an issue for a long time) and it was quite surprising to all of us, most of all for her I’m sure. Very odd how it was handled, especially since we are such a small place. She’s being treated like a criminal, is not allowed back in the building, all her stuff has been boxed up, etc. I find it hard to believe that she would do anything criminal or destructive to warrant this treatment.
I got home exhausted (typical, lately) and overwhelmed by the happenings at work. Too bad Amazing Daddy had a tennis game and left the house at 6:45 so I was in charge of bath and bed. The Boy did well though, although he wasn’t asleep when I left the room and I heard him playing for a while.
Imagine my surprise when the doorbell rang at 10pm and it was our neighbor telling us that TB was hanging out his bedroom window. Of course we make a mad dash up to his room. There we find him throwing the contents of his bedroom out the window. Mind you this was over and through the safety bars that are there. He managed to push through the screen and then start shoving blankets, stuffed animals, books, clothes, shoes, toys, etc. through the window and down on to the driveway.
Of course much of it got stuck on the little roof overhang that is below his window so I had to push the stuff down the rest of the way with a broom. I was pretty pissed off!
He won’t be getting any of that stuff back. I guess it’s one way to get his room clean. I haven’t taken inventory yet, but I think he pushed most of his animals out, which is going to be pretty tough for him since he loves sleeping with them. Oh well! Wish us a better night tonight please!
We’ll go for the next blood draw in three weeks.
Bad news: One of my coworkers was fired today. Of course we are given very little information (although I know that her attitude and inability to get along with our boss has been an issue for a long time) and it was quite surprising to all of us, most of all for her I’m sure. Very odd how it was handled, especially since we are such a small place. She’s being treated like a criminal, is not allowed back in the building, all her stuff has been boxed up, etc. I find it hard to believe that she would do anything criminal or destructive to warrant this treatment.
I got home exhausted (typical, lately) and overwhelmed by the happenings at work. Too bad Amazing Daddy had a tennis game and left the house at 6:45 so I was in charge of bath and bed. The Boy did well though, although he wasn’t asleep when I left the room and I heard him playing for a while.
Imagine my surprise when the doorbell rang at 10pm and it was our neighbor telling us that TB was hanging out his bedroom window. Of course we make a mad dash up to his room. There we find him throwing the contents of his bedroom out the window. Mind you this was over and through the safety bars that are there. He managed to push through the screen and then start shoving blankets, stuffed animals, books, clothes, shoes, toys, etc. through the window and down on to the driveway.
Of course much of it got stuck on the little roof overhang that is below his window so I had to push the stuff down the rest of the way with a broom. I was pretty pissed off!
He won’t be getting any of that stuff back. I guess it’s one way to get his room clean. I haven’t taken inventory yet, but I think he pushed most of his animals out, which is going to be pretty tough for him since he loves sleeping with them. Oh well! Wish us a better night tonight please!
Thursday, May 03, 2007
genetic testing and level 1 ultrasound
12 weeks 2 days
My first full bladder ultrasound. Whoohooo. Smart me though didn't drink as much as they wanted me to and I was still fine. Yeah! Although I still almost peed myself when I sneezed. Reminder to self: start doing those damn Kegel's!
We met with the genetic specialist and managed to confuse the crap out of ourselves. But, ultimately we decided to do the NT and the sequential screen. Frankly, with the embryo of a 30 year old I'm not sure we really need to, but I'm hoping for peace of mind when it is all done.
Apparently the NT measured just fine, so we wait for the blood results in 3 to 5 business days. Based on that we will decide if we want to do an amnio.
Everything on the ultrasound looked fine. Quite an amazing alien baby I have growing in there. Although we saw some profile shots which were just stunning. I swear it looks like our son's profile. Amazing Daddy thinks I'm insane. He's probably right.
Any who....I feel pretty good about things right now.
Yesterday we met with the OB for the first time. I really liked her she was very positive and congratulatory. The nurse even called us kids when she left the room, which cracked me up since AD is going to be 50 on Saturday. Of course, this same nurse managed to alter my weight by 50 pounds on the chart. 50 pounds people! She made it look like I had LOST 50 pounds (which would be awesome) since my visit with the nurse two weeks ago. Despite the doctor making a comment that she thinks this nurse is on drugs, I think I like her!
But back to the doctor. We asked all our questions, mainly about my weight and my Zoloft use. She said not to worry about my weight and to just enjoy being pregnant. She agreed that if I don't gain much weight that would be fine, but I should just eat healthy and try to focus on high protein low carbs. As for the Zoloft she said it is the most studied SSRI in pregnancy and that is what they prefer their patients to be on if they need something. She didn't seem familiar with a study I did a poor job of trying to recall for her about newborns born with pulmonary hypertension (might have helped if I could have remembered that word!) in women taking Zoloft after 20 weeks. Anyway, I'll check out the articles again and then decide. I think ultimately it comes down to is it better to have a happy mother than a miserable one.
I did have confirmation today that I will need to have ultrasounds every other week between weeks 16 and 26 since I had a LEEP done several years ago. Apparently there is some risk of my cervix failing during that time. I asked what the treatment was if any of the US showed there was a problem and the doctor said either bed rest or they would sew it shut. You can imagine how happy Amazing Daddy was to hear that bed rest might be a possibility. Frankly, I'm just not all that concerned. I think the chances of that happening are pretty slim.
So, next OB appointment and next US in four weeks. I'm not sure if I can go that long without pictures!! Yikes.
My first full bladder ultrasound. Whoohooo. Smart me though didn't drink as much as they wanted me to and I was still fine. Yeah! Although I still almost peed myself when I sneezed. Reminder to self: start doing those damn Kegel's!
We met with the genetic specialist and managed to confuse the crap out of ourselves. But, ultimately we decided to do the NT and the sequential screen. Frankly, with the embryo of a 30 year old I'm not sure we really need to, but I'm hoping for peace of mind when it is all done.
Apparently the NT measured just fine, so we wait for the blood results in 3 to 5 business days. Based on that we will decide if we want to do an amnio.
Everything on the ultrasound looked fine. Quite an amazing alien baby I have growing in there. Although we saw some profile shots which were just stunning. I swear it looks like our son's profile. Amazing Daddy thinks I'm insane. He's probably right.
Any who....I feel pretty good about things right now.
Yesterday we met with the OB for the first time. I really liked her she was very positive and congratulatory. The nurse even called us kids when she left the room, which cracked me up since AD is going to be 50 on Saturday. Of course, this same nurse managed to alter my weight by 50 pounds on the chart. 50 pounds people! She made it look like I had LOST 50 pounds (which would be awesome) since my visit with the nurse two weeks ago. Despite the doctor making a comment that she thinks this nurse is on drugs, I think I like her!
But back to the doctor. We asked all our questions, mainly about my weight and my Zoloft use. She said not to worry about my weight and to just enjoy being pregnant. She agreed that if I don't gain much weight that would be fine, but I should just eat healthy and try to focus on high protein low carbs. As for the Zoloft she said it is the most studied SSRI in pregnancy and that is what they prefer their patients to be on if they need something. She didn't seem familiar with a study I did a poor job of trying to recall for her about newborns born with pulmonary hypertension (might have helped if I could have remembered that word!) in women taking Zoloft after 20 weeks. Anyway, I'll check out the articles again and then decide. I think ultimately it comes down to is it better to have a happy mother than a miserable one.
I did have confirmation today that I will need to have ultrasounds every other week between weeks 16 and 26 since I had a LEEP done several years ago. Apparently there is some risk of my cervix failing during that time. I asked what the treatment was if any of the US showed there was a problem and the doctor said either bed rest or they would sew it shut. You can imagine how happy Amazing Daddy was to hear that bed rest might be a possibility. Frankly, I'm just not all that concerned. I think the chances of that happening are pretty slim.
So, next OB appointment and next US in four weeks. I'm not sure if I can go that long without pictures!! Yikes.
Saturday, April 28, 2007
As a combination birthday gift, Christmas gift, some extra cash I made from doing some surveys and some sewing, I was able to buy a new laptop. Whoohoo!
It's very cool and silver and shiny! And I really suck with that touch pad thingy! And I still need to figure out how to balance it on my lap while curled up on the couch. But, theoretically, since it is likely to be right there next to me every evening (since I spent most evenings on the couch) I should be blogging much more frequently! Oh you lucky guys you!
So here are some thoughts from the past week.
I had a nasty cold last weekend, super nasty, snotty, buggery, coughy, some fever, achooachoo cold. Felt most terrible for at least four days. Of course, three of those four days Amazing Daddy was out of town. SH travels out of town maybe twice a year, and usually at my urging, since it is to do some private consulting or advising and generally means a little extra chunk of change for us. So yeah, it all sounded great two months ago when he was invited on this little shindig.
Didn't sound nearly as great when it came time for him to leave and I was on the couch with a 101F on what was so far the nicest day of the year. I convinced The Boy that it would be great fun to have a pajama day and watch TV and movies all day. And for the most part it was, until he wanted to go outside and I said I couldn't, and he cried, because he was ready for me not to be sick anymore. And, that time where I fell asleep on the couch and didn't realize he was upstairs raiding the top of my husbands dresser for gum, tootsie rolls and spare change. Thankfully the phone rang and woke me up, and then I realized I had no idea where my son was.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tuesday my mom called me. I still felt like crap mind you. I had finally told my sister in law that I was pregnant. She has three boys 11, 8 and 5. So my mom told me that she and Kari had been talking and they wondered if I knew how hard this was going to be. It seems to be a running theme with my mother. Oh, you are going to be so tired, how are you going to do this. Are you sure you want to do this with all TB's problems. How are you going to manage. Does AD really want this, he is almost 50 you know. blahhhh, blahhh, blahhh. No matter how much I tell her that I don't want her negative thoughts, she continues.
So on Tuesday I asked her how she thought hearing that was helpful to me. Oh she says, we are just sympathizing. But, I said, it hasn't happened yet, so how is it helping? And then I may have pushed things a little by saying that, well, maybe I should just get rid of the baby now, cause shit, it will be hard and I will be tired, but really, so what if we spent $40,000 getting here, why don't I just go abort the baby right now, cause shit, I'll be tired. WTF!!!!!! So she said that maybe I should go get some sleep, and I haven't heard from her since.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
American Idol hell! Oh yeah, I watched, and cried. And fucking donated $100. Hi honey, yeah, forgot to mention, I donated to AI gives back! Yup, $100. I know.....
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
So it's a little strange being a first time pregnant mom, who already has a child. I'm not a first time mom, but yet I've never experienced pregnancy or birth before either. Where exactly do I fit in?
Do I get a baby shower? I did have a post adoption shower for The Boy that my family did for us. It was very, very nice and they were very generous. My husbands work did a shower for him before we went to get TB and they were extremely generous. My work threw a small party with a cake and pizza for lunch one day and gave us some gifts. All quite nice! Very nice, and I am in no way complaining. I feel quite honored that anyone at all thought of us. Amazing Daddy's family did nothing, but then in the Jewish tradition you don't give baby showers before the baby comes.
So what about with this baby? I never had a true baby shower, as in here I am pregnant as house, guess how big the stomach is, silly shower games and ribbon hats etc. kind of shower. So now I'm pregnant with my first baby, but really, it's not my first baby. And I know many believe you don't get a shower after baby number one. So is it OK to still want a shower? Cause really, I still need all the newborn stuff that we didn't need for TB. How selfish am I being?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
And some more whining about being pregnant for the first time, but not really. This should be a time where AD and I are just all in to my pregnant body and whats going on in there, treating me like a queen, etc.. Everyone asks if he is going out at 2am to get me ice cream. Yeah right, the poor guy is so busy taking care of TB while I sleep on the couch every evening, that there is no way he's waking up for anything at 2am. AD is being so awesome and supportive, and taking care of TB is no easy feat some days. I'm just sad for both of us that we aren't able to revel in this pregnancy the way we have wanted to for almost eight years.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ok, whining is over. Next post more positive I promise.
It's very cool and silver and shiny! And I really suck with that touch pad thingy! And I still need to figure out how to balance it on my lap while curled up on the couch. But, theoretically, since it is likely to be right there next to me every evening (since I spent most evenings on the couch) I should be blogging much more frequently! Oh you lucky guys you!
So here are some thoughts from the past week.
I had a nasty cold last weekend, super nasty, snotty, buggery, coughy, some fever, achooachoo cold. Felt most terrible for at least four days. Of course, three of those four days Amazing Daddy was out of town. SH travels out of town maybe twice a year, and usually at my urging, since it is to do some private consulting or advising and generally means a little extra chunk of change for us. So yeah, it all sounded great two months ago when he was invited on this little shindig.
Didn't sound nearly as great when it came time for him to leave and I was on the couch with a 101F on what was so far the nicest day of the year. I convinced The Boy that it would be great fun to have a pajama day and watch TV and movies all day. And for the most part it was, until he wanted to go outside and I said I couldn't, and he cried, because he was ready for me not to be sick anymore. And, that time where I fell asleep on the couch and didn't realize he was upstairs raiding the top of my husbands dresser for gum, tootsie rolls and spare change. Thankfully the phone rang and woke me up, and then I realized I had no idea where my son was.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tuesday my mom called me. I still felt like crap mind you. I had finally told my sister in law that I was pregnant. She has three boys 11, 8 and 5. So my mom told me that she and Kari had been talking and they wondered if I knew how hard this was going to be. It seems to be a running theme with my mother. Oh, you are going to be so tired, how are you going to do this. Are you sure you want to do this with all TB's problems. How are you going to manage. Does AD really want this, he is almost 50 you know. blahhhh, blahhh, blahhh. No matter how much I tell her that I don't want her negative thoughts, she continues.
So on Tuesday I asked her how she thought hearing that was helpful to me. Oh she says, we are just sympathizing. But, I said, it hasn't happened yet, so how is it helping? And then I may have pushed things a little by saying that, well, maybe I should just get rid of the baby now, cause shit, it will be hard and I will be tired, but really, so what if we spent $40,000 getting here, why don't I just go abort the baby right now, cause shit, I'll be tired. WTF!!!!!! So she said that maybe I should go get some sleep, and I haven't heard from her since.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
American Idol hell! Oh yeah, I watched, and cried. And fucking donated $100. Hi honey, yeah, forgot to mention, I donated to AI gives back! Yup, $100. I know.....
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
So it's a little strange being a first time pregnant mom, who already has a child. I'm not a first time mom, but yet I've never experienced pregnancy or birth before either. Where exactly do I fit in?
Do I get a baby shower? I did have a post adoption shower for The Boy that my family did for us. It was very, very nice and they were very generous. My husbands work did a shower for him before we went to get TB and they were extremely generous. My work threw a small party with a cake and pizza for lunch one day and gave us some gifts. All quite nice! Very nice, and I am in no way complaining. I feel quite honored that anyone at all thought of us. Amazing Daddy's family did nothing, but then in the Jewish tradition you don't give baby showers before the baby comes.
So what about with this baby? I never had a true baby shower, as in here I am pregnant as house, guess how big the stomach is, silly shower games and ribbon hats etc. kind of shower. So now I'm pregnant with my first baby, but really, it's not my first baby. And I know many believe you don't get a shower after baby number one. So is it OK to still want a shower? Cause really, I still need all the newborn stuff that we didn't need for TB. How selfish am I being?
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
And some more whining about being pregnant for the first time, but not really. This should be a time where AD and I are just all in to my pregnant body and whats going on in there, treating me like a queen, etc.. Everyone asks if he is going out at 2am to get me ice cream. Yeah right, the poor guy is so busy taking care of TB while I sleep on the couch every evening, that there is no way he's waking up for anything at 2am. AD is being so awesome and supportive, and taking care of TB is no easy feat some days. I'm just sad for both of us that we aren't able to revel in this pregnancy the way we have wanted to for almost eight years.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Ok, whining is over. Next post more positive I promise.
Thursday, April 26, 2007
Graduation day
Oh boy, it appears the RE and I are parting ways. I think I'm having an anxiety attack.
Another gorgeous ultrasound this morning. Lots of baby movement. That kid was all over the place! Damn...it just kind of hit me. I'm pregnant, as in really, really pregnant! Wow!
Another gorgeous ultrasound this morning. Lots of baby movement. That kid was all over the place! Damn...it just kind of hit me. I'm pregnant, as in really, really pregnant! Wow!
*breath, breath*
So, no more PIO shots. And no blood work to even confirm that when I stop its ok.
*breath, breath*
And only one more week of estrogen patches.
*breath, breath*
I don't think I'm ready. How can they just shove me away like this? Don't they know I have abandonment issues?
Ohboy, I'm not sure I'm ready for this.
Out of the mouths of babes...continued
Before I forget, I really need to write down the latest words of wisdom from The Boy.
---------------------------------------------------------------
Mommy: TB, it is not OK to yell out the window in the morning when you wake up. No one else is up and you are very loud. If you yell out the window tomorrow morning I will come in and close and lock the window and you will not have it open any more. Now, I want you to tell me what I just said.
The Boy: Mommy, no one likes a parrot!
(Of course I busted up laughing. Turns out he's a bit of a repeater at preschool.)
----------------------------------------------------------------
At the zoo recently:
The Boy: wow daddy, that gorilla has a butt just like mine, except it's bigger!
(thankfully he didn't say it was just like mommy's)
------------------------------------------------------------------
Last night:
TB: come on daddy, lets go hang in my room.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
When telling TB that he was going to be a big brother and there is a baby in mommy's belly.
TB: (laughing) nuh uh...that's just silly Mommy.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
And to balance things out, something from our six year old neighbor:
Michael: TB go get the (air quote) ball (air quote).
Seriously, the boy used air quotes when he said ball. And he was really telling TB to go get the ball. And it wasn't just two finger air quotes, it was four finger air quotes. Very reminiscent of Joey on friends.
---------------------------------------------------------------
Mommy: TB, it is not OK to yell out the window in the morning when you wake up. No one else is up and you are very loud. If you yell out the window tomorrow morning I will come in and close and lock the window and you will not have it open any more. Now, I want you to tell me what I just said.
The Boy: Mommy, no one likes a parrot!
(Of course I busted up laughing. Turns out he's a bit of a repeater at preschool.)
----------------------------------------------------------------
At the zoo recently:
The Boy: wow daddy, that gorilla has a butt just like mine, except it's bigger!
(thankfully he didn't say it was just like mommy's)
------------------------------------------------------------------
Last night:
TB: come on daddy, lets go hang in my room.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
When telling TB that he was going to be a big brother and there is a baby in mommy's belly.
TB: (laughing) nuh uh...that's just silly Mommy.
-------------------------------------------------------------------
And to balance things out, something from our six year old neighbor:
Michael: TB go get the (air quote) ball (air quote).
Seriously, the boy used air quotes when he said ball. And he was really telling TB to go get the ball. And it wasn't just two finger air quotes, it was four finger air quotes. Very reminiscent of Joey on friends.
Thursday, April 19, 2007
10 weeks, 2 days
Ok, I'm starting to feel a little more comfortable that this baby may stick around. Ultrasound today was so cool. Lots of moving around and waving of arms and kicking of legs. Baby is head down here.
Amazing Daddy has pretty much told everyone, or at least his mother has. There's telephone and then there's teleBea. Not that I blame her, she's pretty excited and definitely never expected this.
I'm still making my parents wait to tell anyone. Sometimes it is fun to just impose torture on them for no good reason. I did tell my sister-in-law which should relieve some of the anxiety for my mother to tell now that she has at least one person to talk to about it.
It's funny, my mom keeps asking me if I have a feeling about whether it is a boy or a girl. I really don't. I admit I'd like a girl for all the obvious girly reasons, but I truly don't have any sense of what it actually is. Should I?
Next US next Thursday (April 26). I think he was about to let me go today, but I begged for at least one more and he agreed.
I have my first OB appointment tomorrow. I guess it is with the nurse to get all the paperwork set up and lab work slips done. Appointment with the actual doctor is in another two weeks.
I'm still exhausted, and occasionally feel slightly icky stomach, but mostly pretty good.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)