Friday, July 14, 2006

It's official

Yup, the "I'm sorry" call. So the knot is gone. And there were some tears. I feel bad having to tell Amazing Daddy at work. He's having a rough day as it is after being gone for four days. So much crap for him to catch up on. He may have to go in to work this weekend to catch up. Which sucks on many levels. He goes in to work on his day off, but doesn't get to take it off of the vacation days he had to use. And, that means I have to be alone with The Boy. But, I am determined to be a better mom and enjoy the time I'm with him.

So, no more progesterone. Thank god. Hopefully I'll be feeling better by the time I get my period.

So, no Xanax yet. But I did break in to the tortilla chips and made up some queso dip. And then the door bell rang. I thought maybe...flowers? To cheer me up? Although hardly enough time had passed for something like that to happen.

Nope, it's a painter come to pain the front door (ahhh..the first good thing of an association, other than the lawn care and snow shoveling). So I can't even sit here and gorge my face with the chips and salsa, because the front door is in direct line of where I am sitting. And why do I fucking care?

After this I may make chocolate chip cookies. That sounds like great comfort food. Cause you know, why not throw a few more pounds on to the ten that I already gained back during this cycle.

3 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry it wasn't good news. :( I know nothing I can say will make it better, so I'll just offer my best "this sucks so much!" and a virtual hug.

    D

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  2. I'm sorry too. I know just how you feel. I was a blubbering mess yesterday (and had to put on a "nice face" to go over to see my dad, who just had a hernia surgery, and knows nothing about our IVF). I really let loose in the car on the way home (smart, probably not?)

    I too, am thankful to get my body back for a little while, even if it is now a little more floppy than it was to start with. (I haven't beared to weigh myself for the entire cycle, but at least my clothes still fit!) Haven't exercised since the end of the stims phase - I was too afraid that I'd mess something up.

    I'm sorry that your hubbie isn't around - it is really hard to deal with this over the phone.

    I hope our weekends bring healing and renewal. Enjoy some time with Prince Alexi. I'll check in on you on Monday...

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  3. I don't have much to offer either but I'm really sorry it didn't work, and I hear you on the frustration and its so not fair. Nothing about all this IF stuff is- it just sucks.

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