Saturday, April 04, 2009

My fifteen minute cleaning break to blog...and this is why!

Last summer I reached a low point with my feelings about Noah and what he was doing to our family. I really need to write a longer post about that soon. In a nut case shell though, it lead to us receiving eight months of intensive family based therapy. We have two therapists that work with us and either come in to the home for an hour once a week or Rich and I meet with them in their office for an hour. They also see Noah at school or in his aftercare program for an hour every week. They have been immensely helpful to us in changing our parenting approach with him. I need to write more about that soon too.

This post however is about an "ah hah" moment that hit me in our session this week. We were talking about what improvements we have made since our eight months is almost up. Rich was saying how it still frustrated him that Noah doesn't take care of his things, and his room is always a mess because Noah has no respect for anything. And it hit me...Noah doesn't take care of his things or really have any respect for them because Rich and I don't model that example for him. Our room is a mess. Typically our house is a mess. It's not disgusting, dirty messy, but it's cluttered. We have too many "things." And we let those "things" pile up. I will readily admit I'm the worst.

How will Noah learn to respect what he owns and where he lives if Rich and I don't?

I said that to Rich. I'm not sure if he "got it" but it really struck me.

I'll admit, when we were doing the last round of IVF and then I through my pregnancy and ever since then, I've been "stuck." I have very little energy because I don't take care of myself and I've reached a point with the house where I feel overwhelmed so just don't do anything.

I'm not sure yet how I'm going to fix this, but at least I'm realizing I need to. OK, I've known that I need to, but now I finally see how it's impacting my children. Kiel is pretty good at cleaning up his things, but that's because they teach him in daycare. I can't count on that continuing if we don't model it for him here.

So, I'm making a vow here. I'm going to start working on this! It may take some baby steps at first, but I'm going to do it.


  1. I see you mentioned the 15 minutes in the title. That's what I was going to say. Flylady (there is a website). I do belong to a Ya.hoo group in the area if you're intested (fun ladies and it extends beyond cleaning our homes into frienship and support). (I switched blogs if you don't recognize.)

  2. Girl I know just what you are going through. I had the same thoughts. I was going through some kind of funk after I had my last baby and I let my house go. I could tell it was getting to the boys. So I went to the doctor and started cleaning one room at a time. I had to give in also and ask my mother for help, but it all was for the better. We are slowly getting back to normal, but we're getting there. You'll get there too, it just takes a lot of time, love and prayer. Don't forget we are Mommy Warriors we can do anything!!!!!!!

  3. I have so been there! It's hard to keep up with cleaning and taking care of the family and everything. I have started the whole "15 minute" thing when I have a task that is overwhelming. I figure I can do anything for 15 minutes. It really helps to get rid of "stuff" too. We have a small house, so I am REALLY trying to be better about what I bring in. Anyway, just wanted to let you know that you are not alone!