Sunday, August 20, 2006

Yeah, so perhaps my last post was a bit over the top. Although, honestly, I was feeling it last week. This week, somewhat better. As I got closer to my period my hormones seemed to even themselves out. I tend to forget how bad I can feel that last week of my cycle.

So, yesterday marks CD1. Another week or so and I start peeing on sticks. Whoohooo...count down to Lupron!

I just read a post here that references kids doing crafts with glitter glue. Which reminded me of the birthday party I took The Boy to yesterday. They had crafts, which TB had no interest in doing, until everyone else was done of course. Then all he wanted to do was glob on the glitter glue. It took all my self control not to try and direct him. Tell me, why is it so difficult to let kids just do things? Why do I always want him to do it "right?" And just who dictates what right is?

Hmmm...not as profound a post as I had been hoping for.

How about this one...Amazing Daddy just drove his mother home after an afternoon visit. I did everything I could to convince TB to go with him so I could have an hour or two to myself. then as soon as they are out the door I start to feel guilty, and then I'm half convinced they will be in a terrible accident and it will be all my fault because I wanted them gone for a while. I get this amazing sense of guilt and feeling that I can control fate from my mother. I got my depression and issues with food from her too. Thanks Mom, thanks so much for fucking me up.

Ohhhh...Here's a good one. I got very ballsy Friday and I asked my boss for a raise. I found out recently that the women i work with all make more than I do, even though I've been there longer than all but one. I was the only part timer until just a few months ago. It's a long story how I figured all this out, and even longer as to how it actually happened that I was being shorted. But, The Boss took it very well and is going to look in to it. If I am correct, I may be getting a several thousand dollar a year raise soon. Believe me it will be useful. Being the only budd of the boss right now is definitely a good thing. Although useful, the fact that I am sucks for the company because there is a lot of tension.

It was not an easy thing to do. I guess not many people find that an easy conversation to initiate. I had butterflies in my stomach all day. But I did it!
And now I'm sitting here watching a Lifetime movie enjoying my last few minutes of peace before the boys get home.

2 comments:

  1. Glad to hear you're feeling better! Depression is a tough battle.

    Good for you for asking for a raise! That's something I've wanted to do many times in the past but just couldn't get up the gumption.

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  2. Thanks so much for your kind thoughts Stay-at-home Mommy!

    And I did get the raise! Yeah!

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