Tuesday, August 10, 2010

The Stuff that Never Happened - except that now it has!

Is it incredibly un-feminist of me to admit that knowing a man would fight for me is a huge turn on? And I don't necessarily mean the "throw himself in front of a bullet" for me fight. Or even the "get yourself beat up in a dark parking lot" kind of fight. Because quite honestly, I like my men smart too, and both of those things are pretty darn stupid. What I do mean is the "stick up for my wife/girlfriend" way. Hell, even a dad protecting his daughter way (although that is definitely not in the "turns me on" category).*

Yeah, kind of old fashioned, I know. And quite easy to take out of context considering that I do consider myself a strong, capable woman that doesn't need to be taken care of. A strong woman that will also admit that being taken care of at times is awfully nice and does make me a little gooey inside.

So yes, while I can fight my own fights, knowing my husband would step in and protect me gives me those little goose bumps that flutter up and down my spine. (Although I can't imagine being in a situation that would warrant Rich punching someone, it is sexy as hell to consider.) And it warms my heart. Because knowing someone would step outside of their comfort zone for me, to protect me, because they love me that much, is huge. 

On a deeper level, a seriously deeper level, what this means is that I really am worthy of love, at least from one person. I've definitely doubted that at times, as both a girlfriend and as a daughter. But as Rich's wife, I don't doubt it for a second.

It's amazing what a book can get you thinking about, isn't it? This post is inspired by The Stuff That Never Happened by Maddie Dawson and is part of the From Left to Write Book Club. This was one of those books that I just couldn't put down once I started reading it. While Annabelle's life unfolded very differently from mine, there were so many parts of her story that spoke to me. There were several directions I could have gone with this "inspired post" including one about "unanswered prayers," but Neena wrote it so much better in her post What If. Go, read it, just so you too can say "Wow!" when she says "I wouldn't be me. I'd be her."

This post was inspired by the From Left to Write August book club featuring The Stuff that Never Happened by Maddie Dawson.  In full disclosure I received a free copy of the book for this review. 

*After breaking up with my first serious boyfriend after college, I was devastated. Truly and completely devastated. Like deep depression devastated. I remember talking with my dad, and while I don't remember the actual conversation, I do remember asking him if he would go beat the guy up. Now I never actually expected him to, or even really wanted him to, I just needed him to acknowledge that I had been hurt and he wanted to protect me. Unfortunately, his answer was  a very simple "No." It's interesting how what was probably a silly conversation to my father, had such a powerful effect on me and how I saw myself.



  1. The fact that you quoted that line from Neena's post proves that we're twins. That line got me too. Like, I stopped reading and reread that line about six times before moving on. Fab!!

    By the way, it is kind of spine tingling to know our husbands would do such things for us. I too get gooey inside when he does the little things. Like when he comes to bed long after me and rubs my back. I'm awake enjoying every moment of it even though he thinks I'm sleeping.

    I'm in a gooey mood today. I might even go cry it out now....

  2. this is such a good point--and I think epitomizes what Annabelle missed from Grant. She had no idea that he would try to keep her, and he didn't let her know that part. Thanks for such a great post!
    (Pamela, I'm in a gooey mood, too. You've put it perfectly!)

  3. Forget how independent we are, we still want to be taken care of by someone.